Confessions of a Hospital Snob

I consider myself a hospital snob. It is easy for me because I live so close to Boston and some of the top hospitals for anything I have ever needed. When my friends ask my opinion about healthcare, I always steer them in that direction, even with many other hospital options much closer.

As a cardiac patient, all of my care has been in Boston. But beyond cardiac care, I still make the trip in, too. The few occasions I have opted for my local ER or doctor, their lack of understanding of my complex heart issues has lead me right back down the Mass Pike. Being cared for at a great institution, I have had great doctors and access to advanced research and technology. I have a wonderful primary doctor and my cardiac team is the best and has been since I started there as an infant.

I was reluctant to make the switch from my pediatric cardiologist to the Adult Congenital Group because I had such a wonderful cardiologist. Times change, however, and so must we. As we age, the lines blur and our bodies are not so segmented. Am I tired because I am old or having a cardiac change? Is it hormones or a rhythm problem? Seeing the whole body, and the mind, must be worked into the equation.

This brings me to my current cardiologist. I went in last week, after seeing my primary, because I felt tired, an ache in my chest… all the same stuff I felt a year ago. After the tests, and his consultation of them, he spent a very long time talking with me after he said that things are working and my heart is still improving.

I didn’t get the feeling that I should be dismissed because the tests said my heart was still functioning properly, though. I got the feeling that we were going to sit there until we investigated why I felt the way I did and what we could do about it. And a lot of this involved wrapping my head around my now-changing heart. What my doctor really helped me see is it is all connected—and changing—and that where I am at this point in my cardiac adult life is going to be different; that now-different person with the cardiac condition needs to be cared for.

I am not good with change, I have found out over the last six months. And having lived my adult life without any real symptoms or limitations, I am seeing that is not going to be the case for the rest of my adult life. I have to adjust—and I will be honest, it sucks. But knowing I have a cardiologist who will take the time and see the whole picture of who I am, not just what makes me tick, is going to make it a lot easier.